2016 Reflections: On Ease, Trust, and Luv

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Happy Old Year, NamaPeeps! (I'm not wishing you a happy new year until it is actually the new year, DUH!) Here we are, at the tail end of 2016, a year that many are considering to be the "worst year ever".

Not to rub it in or anything, but 2016 has been FAR from my worst year ever. As a matter of fact, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that 2016 has probably been my best year ever.

I've grown SO much. And I've gotten more and more comfortable with who I am - knowing that who I am can and will continuously evolve over time. I've realized that I can be okay with that, I don't have to fight it in order to stay "on brand". I'm a person, not a product! 

For the last handful of years, I've struggled to put my finger on exactly what it is that I want to do, or who it is I want to be. I went from carefree college girl to NYC fashion intern and writer to fashion PR girl to fitness buff and on and on and on. I changed so much, but oftentimes without a vision of where I was headed, made that much more painful by my incredibly high standards for myself. 

Sometimes, I felt like I was just throwing spaghetti at the wall and seeing what stuck, if anything! And while that is, undoubtedly, just part of life, I wanted SO BADLY for something to stick. Add that desperation to the fact that I had literally zero trust that the universe was working with me, in my favor, and you've got the angstiest mid-twenties crisis you've ever seen. I hadn't yet learned that if I could just lean into positivity and love, everything would work out exactly as it should, if not better! I couldn't trust, so I FORCED decision making with relentless power in order to make things happen. 

2016 was the year where I learned to trust myself and the universe around me. Not coincidentally, it was also the year my vision came together. It was the year where I put in the work to lay the foundation for the future I want to create. It was the year where I allowed myself the space to see what I wanted, to feel what I wanted.

In 2016, I learned to speak up for myself, to other people (still a work in progress!) and to the universe. I learned to ask for what I wanted.

I learned to sleep a little longer, eat a little slower, and breathe a little deeper. 

In 2016, I fell in love with myself. I got serious about self care. I deepened my yoga practice. I connected intimately with my friends. I actually (successfully) reduced my coffee intake  (6 cups a day to 1 or 2!). I stopped muscling through, favoring ease and grace over horsepower. I spent some serious time alone with myself, asking myself what I needed and wanted more of in my life and thinking about how I would go about getting said things.

In 2016, I generated the vision and purchased the seeds. I caught a glimpse of where I am headed and accepted that diligent patience will be the force that carries me through any storm. 

In 2017, I will plant, water, and raise the seeds with love, care, humor, and flexibility. I will lean into love as the answer to stress and anxiety. I will honor my intentions while leaving space for the gorgeous surprise of the unknown. I will grow this space, my writing in general, and my business as a holistic health coach with a focus and understanding I've never had before. And in 2017, I fully intend to fall in love with someone new. I can feel it.

Wishing you all a glorious end of year, filled with reflection, manifestation, and a clear vision for the coming year! I am so grateful to all of you who read this blog and support me through all of my crazy adventures - thank you! Look out for some exciting new content and announcements coming in 2017!

NamaSTAY reading, my friends.

Much love - xx

Steph